Well, I should be asleep but I can't. We leave for China in 7 hours. The car is loaded and everyone is excited. Barb arrived tonight and she is going to be a tremendous help. I am trying to avoid being fearful of this whole process (15 hour flight) and remember to be thankful for this amazing experience we are about to embark on. I am feeling grateful that we are about to experience many things that most people never will. My thoughts are on Bliss and how she has no idea what is about to happen to her. I am saddened when I think about how traumatic the next few weeks will be for her. She will be torn away from all she has known. We have had to continuously remind ourselves to keep our expectations of her very low. We have been told that she may not react to us for a long time. I can't wait to see her smile. I only have four pictures of her and she is not smiling in any of them. Actually she looks quite stunned in all of them.
I can't believe we are finally leaving. This has taken so long. It almost doesn't seem real. I have been asked several times over the past few months if I am worried that I will not bond to her in the same way I have to my biological children. At first, early in the process, I did fear this. That fear is completely gone now. Her face has become so incredibly familiar, it is as if we have always known her. We'll be holding her in 48 hours! I just wish I could take something to knock me out until then.